I remember leaving school, taking the bus home really eager to interview my subject. I’m definitely not the textbook savvy type, so when I heard ‘field work’ I got a little excited. It’s not often I look forward to doing homework. That day in class I went onto Facebook and typed in my status ‘I’m in need of an interviewee for a class assignment!’ Not five minutes later, there were about ten people willing to do the interview. I chose the first one, the name of the person is not to be disclosed.
After I chose the interviewee, we exchanged words in their inbox, speaking of an interview date and time. It happened to be later that day at about seven to seven thirty. The bus ride home was a nervous one. Even though I was excited, I was hoping I could do this assignment properly. Looking out the window, I had high hopes. As the bus arrived at the terminal, I double checked my bag for my Bloggie, a pen and some paper. I had about three hours before I had to be at my subjects house. Hopping on the number one bus, I took some deep breaths.
In no time I arrived at my street, the day was sunny with little clouds. Snow was soft on the ground rolling over every incline. I trudged through it with my sneakers, hardly winter gear but I was never one for snow boots. What felt about three seconds, was actually five minutes and I made it in through my side door. I climbed the stairs to my room and tossed my bag down, pulled out a pen and some paper and furiously started writing ideas for questions. There were approximately thirty five questions. Realizing that there were way to many, I was proud. It’s better to have way to many than not enough, and I still had two hours left before I had to bus to the interviewees house.
The eraser scrubbed the paper and my eyes followed each rough stroke. Which questions should go? How would I make this story flow? Tick, tick, tick.. Time went by and I was indecisive. Finally, I grew impatient and didn’t think about it. I scrubbed off fifteen questions. My eyes darted to the clock, the ticking was starting to make me tremble with anxiety. I swallowed my heart, I had thirty minutes. I was going to be late. I ripped my bag from the floor and threw it on my bed. I frantically accumulated my things–paper, pen and bloggie, yanked open a pocket on my bag and threw them in. While I was rushing around, I called my subject multiple times, no answer. Frustrating built, and I booked it out the door. At seven thirty, I made it to the terminal. I felt ill.. of course, my confidence is stripped from me once again.
The bus arrived at eight. I jumped on while, in my head a war was waging. This happens every time. Something has to go wrong by my own hand. Thoughts raced in my head, and what felt like an hour later, I arrived on my subjects street. The snow was an obstacle I was not in the mood to battle. My anger forced my to run, and run hard. Each foot stomped through the snow spraying it in every direction. My fists pounded the air in front of me.. I couldn’t hit it hard enough. Ten minutes of battling the relentless Canadian winter and I burst out of the snow onto a cement porch.
I prayed my interviewee was still home and wanted to be interviewed. The last thing I needed was to be turned away. Knocking, I was told to come in. Opening the door I felt a wave of relief wash over my shoulders, blowing the anger from my chest. Everything was going to be okay.
So far, I feel as if my time management skills have gotten better. The only problem is.. not being in school and continuing to be good at it. I can use my time well in school. During reading week .. I was pretty unproductive. Not proud of myself. But I did have a blast! I think my only problem is getting started. Once I’m started, I seem to get right into my work. My classmates and I had a whole week to work on our Radio Scripts, I didn’t do anything to it. I have a feeling it’s because I have this disorder (I made it up.. I think) called P.M.O. (Problems Missing Out) I can’t stand being at home working on assignments when there could be something crazy going on that I’m missing out on. My social life means a lot to me.. unfortunately, I believe it means more to me than school.
There is this quote my girlfriend told me..
“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change“.
Now whenever I think of homework being something I have to do, I try to change my thoughts about into, wanting to do it. It is hard to live by, but I feel like it has changed me as a person. I honestly believe, that I’ve been living by that quote long before I heard it. It has saved my life many times. If only I used it well in high school.
I know that my life style and mood have improved because of my changed perspective on school. School used to depress me a lot. Now I look forward to going to school. It’s the simple things like, getting up in the morning and going to school, just because I look forward to those tasty breakfast burritos in the Loyalist College cafeteria! Yummm! I look forward to class to see my comments on Twitter or Linked In, even my blog.
Anyways, I definitely lead you off topic.. I tend to do that. But I was still talking about time management. Going to school is good time management, right? If only that was all that was involved.. WAIT! I have to change the way I think! So, I’m doing this blog (to be honest) because I’m supposed to post something for class. I’ve really been meaning to post more often, in my own time. Another thing that shows my
need want for improvement.
I have an idea! I’ll try listing out some of the things that do distract me from getting started.
Facebook is a huge one. It almost seems like when I have important things to do, and I’m on facebook, everyone wants to talk to me about something. When I’m completely bored, no one talks to me. I do like to interact with people a lot, it’s quite important to me.
Another thing is having guests over to my house, I just love to tend to them. I would do a lot for another person, even if it’s effecting me. They know that they distract me, but I tell them it’s my choice to let them and it is! I’m capable of making my own decisions, and I prefer it that way. I’m sure everyone does.
P.M.O is another big one for me. My feet and heart itch to get involved out there, I know that completing my homework and getting good marks will help me get out there in the future. My life up until I was 17-18 years old, I lived in the past and worried about the future. Someone told me that I need to start living in the moment, and so I have been. But it is dangerous sometimes. It’s healthy to think and prepare for the future.. but it scares me. It freaks me right out to think about where I’ll be in 5-10 years. I want to start combining living for the moment and preparing for the future, and I will learn it one day.
Youtube is a killer one. I get on youtube and search for new music. I just keep going and going, music makes me forget everything except how I feel in that second. It takes me on the greatest adventure of life, and oh boy how I like me a good adventure! But Youtube is a tricky one. I’ve created a play list of songs on Youtube so I don’t have to keep going on it and looking for another song. The play list plays right through and music helps me concentrate. I get so easily distracted by everything around me while working, music gives me a constant beat and a rhythm to think in.
Twitter.. oh twitter, constantly feeding me world news, always new things to look at and to search up and learn about. It’s a great thing for my ADD, with all its spontaneous information, so different and random each and every time. I do blame/thank my teachers for introducing me to it! 🙂
I always have an over load of personal projects I’d like to do for myself in my own time, but it does take up homework time tremendously. Personal projects of mine tend not to be completed as well. So it isn’t just school I have difficulties with.
Hmm.. If I can think of anything else, I try to update!
This photo was taken accidentally, while I was sitting in front of a computer. I checked out the picture and I really like it, it speaks to me.
The lights in the front represent my hopes and dreams and everything I want and want to be. In the background, its darker and harder to see clearer. I’ve always felt left behind or, shall I say, in the dark. I do it to myself though, everyday I become more aware of this. In the picture I’m aiming for the lights.. its a constant struggle. This picture kind of frustrates me as well. If only I was a little closer..
How can I choose anyone other than Tegan and Sara? I mean, they are amazing musicians, they are twins AND they are gay. They were also my second concert of life too. I cried when they stepped on stage for real. Of course, they played my favourite song last, oh the anticipation! All of their song are amazing. Honestly, there isn’t ONE song I don’t like. My all time favourite song by Tegan and Sara is ‘Living Room’ which is on their album ‘If It Was You’.
They currently have six albums out. From lastest to first it goes ‘Sainthood’, ‘The Con’, ‘So Jealous’, ‘If It Was You’, ‘The Business Of Art’ and ‘Under Feet Like Ours’. Their first album ‘Under Feet Like Ours’, leans more towards the garage rock style, while ‘Sainthood’ is electro-pop rock. With all of the albums in between, you can really hear the transition of style they took. Even there personal styles changed as well, but that could easily be them growing up. Both of them look alot more professional. Personally, I enjoy seeing the change they have made.. makes myself more comfortable about changing.
And here is the URL of their official website, which by the way, is very well done. The feel of the site relates to their personal brand well. http://teganandsara.com/
Another extremely amazing reason I adore this duo is their remixes with DJ Teisto! ‘Feel It In My Bones’ and ‘Back In Your Head’ are truly amazing and exhilarating, I seriously cannot get enough of those two songs. I’m a HUGE fan of Trance music, so these song blow my mind.
Last but NOT least, I adore them because they are gay. I like that they are an extremely positive role models for all the LGBT community. Both of them are very open about their sexuality and have written songs about being gay. I wish that every queer folk out there could be as open and cool about it as they are. It is really inspiring when people can rise from the torment and bullying into the spot light to show the world what they have gone through, and to help others who are currently struggling with what they have struggled with.
If I could see any rock band in concert again, I would see Tegan and Sara again. Only this time, hopefully I will be able to meet them. A coffee would be nice. 🙂